How many Facebook groups have you been in where someone asks for some help advice and everyone and their mother comes out of the woodwork with their two cents? Or maybe you’ve been thinking to yourself, “I’ve fallen off the wagon” or “If I can only get back on track.” Sometimes we get busy with life and we lose track of our goals. Well, I have a seven-step framework for you to help you create that repeatable success.
1. Decide what it is that you want. Pick one thing because that way you stay focused. Pick that goal and I’m going to see it through to the end. Whether it’s “I want to run a marathon,” be it “I want to start a business,” be it “I want to find a relationship.” Whatever it is, this applies to all, but I’m going to focus in on fitness because that’s what I do. So for instance, if I told myself I was going to lose my muffin top, is that something I’m going to stick with?
2. Get clear. What is it that clearly defines what you want? What do I have to do to get rid of that muffin top? And trust me, it isn’t a thousand abs a day. This is like punching the address into GPS so that you know… you’re like, “We’re going to 123 Main Street. We’re going to Lose That Muffin Top Village; that’s where we’re going.”
3. Make a Connection. Once I have my GPS locked and loaded then I have to connect to that goal. I want you to think about what it is that you want, so if I want to lose that muffin top, I want to be so connected and say, “Why do I want this?” Because it’s your why. Your why is you own internal motivation. We can’t always look for external motivation because it’s short-lived. Unless you hire someone, who lives with you or you have an amazing live-in support system like a spouse, kid, whatever, you need that internal motivation to get you going. So, for trying to lose my muffin top I’d say, “I don’t want to lay down on my bed to stuff myself into it? I want to be able to like look in the mirror and be like, ‘How you doing?’ to myself.” External accountability is awesome, but internal motivation is key and that is your why.
4. It takes Commitment. This is where you put your money where your mouth is. Here is where you write out your initial plan, and not this rigid structured plan but a plan with flexibility. Take some time to think about what are your non-negotiables. Everyone has those non-negotiables. Maybe for you it might be you need to have a glass of wine every night, but I’m going to tell you, keep those non-negotiables in and there might be some wiggle room if you’re not hitting your goals, but always decide that what are your non-negotiables.
To help you keep your commitment, find a support system. Do you need someone who is going to help you map this out? Are you going to need someone who is going to help hold you accountable to what you’ve just written out as your non-negotiables? And what does commitment look like for you? Some people are commitment-phobe, some people are afraid of failure or success.
5. Have the courage to change. Here’s where a lot of people get stuck. You might have got clear, you might have made the decision, you might have found your why, and you might be like, “Yep, I’m ready.” And then you’re ready until stuff gets hard, and stuff is going to get hard, stuff is going to get unclear, stuff is going to get messy, because I know that for many people at this age we’ve been on umpteen diets, we’ve been there, done that, got the t-shirt and the shaker bottle for it.
6. Then create new habits. I’m big on habits because habits will keep you going. It’s stronger than just having a plan, it’s stronger than willpower, it’s stronger than discipline. When you create a habit, it’s going to last. One of the habits that I’ve created over the last year is I wanted to increase my water or make my water more consistent, and like I said, I have coffee, so I have my first cup of coffee and then I have a glass of water. And once I have that glass of water then I can have my second cup of coffee. I teach group fitness classes and so I fill up my water bottle during the group fitness class and then I make sure that I drink that whole bottle of water either by the time class is over or by the time I get home of teaching that class, so two triggers that force me to drink water.
7. Be consistent. In Pulp Fiction, Samuel Jackson and John Travolta are looking for this… I think it’s a either a box or briefcase, I can’t remember, but every time they come across it or someone comes across it, they open it up and there’s this giant glow. Well that glow is consistency, that’s what we’re always looking for because when we get to that point where we’re doing things on a consistent level, boom, bang, boom, results are not far behind.
The bulk of the framework is about staying in control rather than having a diet or the struggle to diet control you. And what I love about the framework is that it doesn’t cause me to suffer or struggle, because been there, done that and that just stinks, it stinks, and no one wants to do that.
I’d love your feedback. I want to hear what you think about the framework and if it’s something that can help center you when you feel like you’re spinning out of control. Let me know.