Who Else Wants To Know The Mystery Behind Self Trust

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SELF TRUST…. We need to talk about self-trust because I feel like it is SUCH A limiting factor for so many women!  What is self-trust anyways?…. Self-trust is simply listening to our own thoughts, listening to those inner voices in our head, listening to that intuition, or looking to the universe for guidance or a sign!  BUT when you don’t have self-trust, you lose the ability to create a sense of wellbeing. You lose that ability to create a sense of internal happiness!!

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But aren’t we, as humans, always out to seek that external validation?? And heck yeah, it’s nice to have people agree with us, but it’s also really nice to be the person to initiate the agreement. It feels good to say, this is what I believe, and this is what I am going to do, and I trust myself so much!! Self-trust helps us to honor our emotions and present the best version of ourselves to the world.  And it tells us that whatever comes our way, we got it, no matter what. 

So why oh why do we ever lose our self-trust if it is that important to us!  And HOW do we lose it?  Self trust comes from our own self judgment!  WEEE  are our own worst critics!  And those judgments that we have against ourselves, start to build negative beliefs in that inner girl, that inner critic…  [And magic makers, if you struggle with that inner critic, I have a holeeee podcast devoted to this so go listen to it after you read this!]

That inner critic keeps telling you that maybe we aren’t quite going to win if we stick to something, or maybe in the past we did stick to something and it didn’t work out quite the way we want so what is the point to keep going!  Or maybe it is the people you surround yourself with, those negative Nancy’s are telling you that you aren’t good enough or you cannot do it.  Or maybe you have gotten into the habit of constantly going against your gut. Maybe you’ve gotten SOOO USED to second guessing yourself that you don’t even know how to make a move anymore.  You feel stuck and unable to move forward.

But guess what?? YOU ARE NOT STUCK!  You are and were never stuck.  You can move forward, and you WILL move forward.  You just have to take that first step.  And know that you are only as good as your next decision. But that decision doesn’t have to be a life altering decision.  It can be simple, so simple that when you fail, and you may, that you are okay with it, and you are okay with getting back up on that horse and trying something else or trying it again until you get it right.

I am asking you to say, “You know what?  Failing isn’t fatal. Failing doesn’t end me.” Failing only shows you something that didn’t work.  It doesn’t mean that everything you try moving forward will not work.  Failing gives you a chance to regroup and ask yourself, “What happened?  What caused it to be a failure?”. 

Alright, take losing weight for instance, because duh this is what I do!! But when I have my clients, we go through the REPS formula and that is what is going to tell you if it is sustainable or not. Will you even be able to physically do it?   But maybe you didn’t learn or use the REPS formula and that is okay because now you can!! (REPS) But if you run the REPS formula when you start, you will begin to get clear on what the outcomes are going to be. How this going to workout for you?  And you will see if it is truly possible to reach those goals like I know you can!😉

Please, for the love of God, universe, whoever, if you do fail and you have to regroup and try again, DO NOT keep going back on that failure. Move forward, do not look back and try not to fall down the same hole.  Just FORGIVE YOURSELF!  This is paramount! Forgiving yourself doesn’t do anything harmful to yourself! You are doing something to better yourself. So it is okay to ask yourself for forgiveness.

I want you to start making small commitments to yourself.  I hate cardio… like loatthhhhee it!  But I made a small commitment to do a little bit of cardio or movement every day.  I started small with something I know I did not like, but I did it anyways a little at a time. 

I also want you to get quiet… What I mean by getting quiet is slowing down.  When you slow down and you get quiet, your gut starts talking to you and then your intuition starts to talk and listen to that inner voice.  And you may not say it out loud, but you have to get quiet to hear the answers you are asking.

Also, you have to be willing to take risks! Not everything you are going to do is going to be a slam dunk and that is okay! When people come to health professionals, they want these black and white answers a  yes or a no but that isn’t how it works and that isn’t what they get.  You have to be willing to stop doing what you have always done and try something new!  Nobody got anywhere by staying inside their comfort zone.  You have to step outside of it and try something new! Be open to doing things differently.

So… How do we start to have that trust within ourselves to commit to doing what you are saying you are going to do? 

  1. Clear out the toxic crap! Social media? Personal life? What is filling your life with toxic people and information that you just don’t want to be feeding into?  Get it out of there!
  2. Old Patterns.. “If I am not perfect and blow my diet by Wednesday, I am going to say screw it and start again on Monday. And keep repeating this pattern every week.  Don’t get into that old pattern again. Be prepared and make sure you don’t fall down the road of old patterns again. 
  3. Owning who you are and trusting that if you make a plan, you are the one to decide how it is going to go down. Decide that you are going to trust yourself!
  4. Do the simplest things to build that self-trust.  And eventually it will become who you are and what you do.
  5. Have PATIENCE!  Patience doesn’t come overnight! I too had to find patience and through my whole healing journey, I have taught myself to put 1 foot in front of the other and I cannot sprint to the finish line.
  6. And lastly… once you have hit that goal, keep on going.  Don’t put your feet up and call it a day.  You have to keep working on things and not stop.

Just like the Fit Girl Magic Formula. Great habits lead to great routines that lead to consistency and THAT consistency leads to the results!!!  And don’t forget to work on being consistently committed.  It all takes practice and you will get there!! Not overnight, but you will get their magic makers.  Sustainability is key… and it is the key to everything!!

What is the number 1 takeaway you got from this blog or the podcast? I want to know in the comments and on social media!! Hit me up and let me know your thoughts!! What does self-trust mean to you??

LINKS

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/FabFitSquad

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic/

Website: https://www.kimbarnesjefferson.com/

Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fit-girl-magic-healthy-living-for-women-over-40/id1476883661

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-dethrone-your-inner-mean-girl/id1476883661

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